Some people say the first year of marriage is the hardest. If that’s the case, it ain’t all that bad. Of course, we’ve been very blessed in that we have not faced a ton of adversity. I admit that, as a long-time bachelor, it’s been a bit of a challenge to change my ways. I’ve gone from 5 or 6 motorcycles to 3. My time is no longer my own and I can no longer fly by the seat of my pants; girls like to make plans. No problem. It may be a big change, but a worthy one.
The Bible tells women “Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.” That’s in Ephesians 5:22-24. Notice something important here: it tells this to the wives, NOT to the husbands.
What does the Bible tell husbands? “Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;” … “So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself.” … “Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.” That’s in Ephesians 5:25, 28, and 33. Guys aren’t told “you’re the head of your wife.” We’re instructed to love them as we love ourselves. Not just that…we’re told THREE TIMES. Sometimes it takes us a few time to get it into our heads.
That’s just one example of what the Bible says about husbands and wives. It’s not intended to discriminate against women or render them subservient. It’s outlining the structure of a godly marriage. If both parties of a marriage fulfil their roles, things work the way God intended them to. If my wife looks to me to be the head of the house, I (assuming I have any character at all) will knock myself out to live up to that role for her. If I am a take charge kind of guy and take up my responsibilities as a husband, she can feel secure in letting me handle them. It just plain WORKS.
I, as any of the guys I know would say of themselves, have married a far lovelier woman than I deserve. I looked for her forever without success. I would pray for God to bring along a nice Christian woman to be my wife, then get up off my knees and try to find her myself. Only shortly after I finally prayed “okay, I will leave it up to you, I won’t try to do it myself,” that he finally brought her along. And I’m gonna love and serve her forever.